Guilty (Musical) Pleasures

Not the greatest day today.  I needed some music to make me feel good.  So what did I go to?  Prepare to laugh.  Billy Talent.  Yep.  Remember how a little while ago, we were talking about how everybody has their secret crushes?  Well, this is sort of the same thing.  There are some artists who I REALLY REALLY enjoy, but am totally embarrassed to admit to.  I’m not talking just a song or two, I mean, REALLY enjoy.  So just to give you a few, here’s a quick Top 5 Guilty (Musical) Pleasures (in no particular order).

1. Billy Talent

Billy Talent

Why should I be embarrassed about liking these guys?  Well, maybe the fact that a good chunk of their audience is 15 year old girls.  Not a good group to have things in common with.  Not cool.  What else?  I’m not really sure that I need much more than that. You know when you pull up to a red light and you look over and see somebody TOTALLY rockin’ out?  Um, yeah, that’s me with Billy Talent.  I’m going to go lay face down in a closet now.

2. John Mayer

John Mayer

Face it.  John Mayer may want to think he’s really cool, but he’s the kind of guy soccer moms go for.  He’s the guy the older women at work get all happy about in the lunchroom.  I mean, look at this photo.  Need I really say more?  Some of his songs are absolutely dreadful (Waiting for the World to Change), but a lot of his other stuff really works for me.  Also, gotta like when a guy steps up and says that he just doesn’t see any blues revival being made by the White Stripes, that he likes them, but he just doesn’t see what all of the blues talk is about.  With you there dude.

3. Nelly Furtado

Nelly Furtado

You have to admit, when you hear her talk, the scramble that follows (you know, the one where you are scrambling to find anything, ANYTHING else to do that will provide enough distraction to save you from your brain falling out your nose) is entertaining.  I liked her first CD.  Wasn’t sure what that whole I THINK I MIGHT BE FROM PORTUGAL CD was about, but now I really like her latest.  All quite poppy, embarrassing music for any guy who considers himself a man (enter joke here).  This is the kind of stuff where I’m in the car, windows up, roof closed, pumping one of the songs from Loose, until I see anybody, which prompts me to turn down the music, even though the windows are closed.  I have even gone so far as to park my car in the driveway, turn up the music with all of the windows closed, get out of the car to see how close to the car I have to be to hear what is going on, adjust the volume and repeat.  Turns out while Volkswagen GTIs are good at keeping the noise out of the interior, it escapes the car like a fart in an elevator.  Just gets out and leaves everybody wondering, “What the hell was that?  Come on man!”  At least the one thing I can mention (again) is that I don’t know how many people look better in a pair of jeans than Nelly Furtado.  Yikes!

4. Rufus Wainwright

Rufus Wainwright

I’ll never forget this moment.  Back in my single days, there was this chick I met at a festival down at Harbourfront.  She was pretty hot.  I picked her up one night, we were going to the Ronny Jordan concert.  As I turned the ignition, I completely forgot that I had the gayer than gay Rufus Wainwright playing in my car.  To give you an idea of Rufus’ latest look, her performed on Letterman in German lederhosen.  If you think I am joking, check it here.  I remember was watching this, my wife looked at me and I swear I could read her mind, “Oh my God, Jay is on the down low.  For real.”  Anyway, back to that date.  It went completely downhill from there.  The fact that she didn’t appreciate that Ronny Jordan had some guys from Jamiroquai backing him up that night made it worse, but having Rufus Wainwright blaring in my car couldn’t have helped.  I don’t care, still love ya enjoy your music Rufus.

5. Rod Stewart

Rod Stewart

Okay, this one I can justify.  I’m not so much of a Rod Stewart fan from his recent stuff, more of his stuff from back when he was the lead singer for Faces.  You know, back when he had Ron Wood in his band.  Back when he was actually a drunken wild child and his music had some bite.  I even like the Maggie May stuff too.  Can’t deny those are good songs.  But here’s the thing, as much as I try to denounce his older music, I’ll be damned if when “You’re In My Heart” comes on the radio, I don’t find myself quietly singing along.  “You’re in my heart, you’re in my soul, you’ll be my breath should I grow old, you are my lover, you’re my best friend, you’re in my soul.”  Damn, would somebody pass me a beer or something? 


  1. avatar Dawn Says:

    Come on Jay…Rod Stewart?????? I can’t take it.

  2. avatar Dawn Says:

    btw, I have a futile crush on Rufus. Oh if you weren’t so….

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